Feeling somewhat at home.

Well, I've done it. I've finally gotten out.

Out of what? Oh, that little one room that is your bedroom, plus baby's room, plus play room, sometimes dining room and office? Well, what the heck? Why didn't you do that earlier.

Ya know, I've been asking myself the very same thing.

(If you're wondering why do I live in one room...see earlier posts that talk about moving, living in a 3 bedroom apt w/ my BIL & SIL, and another married couple who are good friends, answering the call God has placed on our hearts for this city...or check out Clarity.)

Yesterday and today I took advantage of the free baby-time programs offered at the Santa Monica Public Library. The story-time consisted of singing rhymes and motion songs, reading storybooks, today there was even a flannel graph! The best part was watching Novi talk to younger babies like preschoolers talk to her - so cute! I even met some new people (imagine that?) who are not only fellow Santa Monica residents, but are my neighbors as well, and close! Who would have thought?

I've also put down mommy meet-up groups as well as local MOPS group meetings on my calendar. I'm really excited about all of the new people that Novi and I are meeting. Watching Novi react to a new environment, shyly at first, and then warming up to it, not being afraid to explore brings so much joy to my heart. I definitely want her to exercise her adventurous spirit outside of our pantry...and my underwear drawer, haha. Not to mention, walking to these places is giving me some exercise (finally)!

A few weeks ago, Nathan was trying to encourage me to go to the park, go to the library, go do anything really, but I felt so uncomfortable and unmotivated. Unable to figure our why I felt this way, I began to pray and of course, God began to answer. He showed me deep down I was harboring insecurities, fear, and even some bitterness towards this being our home and not Pennsylvania. I missed my family, my friends. I didn't want to have to start from scratch and make those new relationships, which take time, work, and effort...but I was reminded that we're here to do work for His Kingdom...and that this call is BIGGER than all of that.

Please understand that I was not complaining, we are so blessed. But I must continue to remind myself to exchange my plans for His plans. I must not allow all of that stuff to get into the way of being able to clearly see what my responsibility is as wife, mother, minister, neighbor, friend, and follower of Jesus Christ. I have to stop feeling sorry for myself and quit focusing on what is behind, like the Apostle Paul, "...I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead..." (Phil 3:14 NLT). Of course that doesn't mean I have to forget my friends or family back East, but that I now focus on that which God has set before me - the work that I am called to do here.

And here is home.

...and finally...it's starting to feel that way.