Double Rainbow

Some of you may have heard the term before -- "rainbow baby."  A rainbow baby is the baby you have after having a miscarriage. I had a daughter in 2009 (I like to call her our "sunshine baby"), a miscarriage at 11 weeks in 2011 (we refer to miscarried babies as "angel babies:), a 2nd daughter in 2012, a miscarriage at 7 weeks in 2014, and then a 3rd daughter in 2015. This post is about her - our second rainbow baby, our 3rd girl, our 5th child, Nessa Laine.

When you look at the date this is written, July 17, 2018, you may think, "Wow, you waited a long time to write this post!" And I will say, "You're right! Going from 2 to 3 kids is no joke. You leave man to man defense and enter a zone defense. You lower your expectations exponentially. You realize that someone is gonna feel left out and there's not way to divide and conquer anymore - someone is gonna be upset. And that is pretty much true. However, because of having to adjust so much and releasing more and more control I have found that having 3 kids has been a liberating experience. I have enjoyed motherhood so much more - and maybe it's because I've completely lost my mind - but 2.5 years into it - I'm starting not to care that I have. Actually I am 5 days away from my due date with my 4th and final child and first son, which is what has finally made me sit down and write Nessa's birth story so I don't get details mixed up with the next one.

My pregnancy had going smoothly as others before. Coming out of a season of loss with the previous baby, you're always on edge until you cross the milestones that you didn't with the last one.  God showered us with blessings, a very uncomplicated pregnancy, healthy baby throughout, and like I had with Kensington, our 2nd, once 37 weeks rolled by, I was starting to cramp and my body was beginning my very slow process to D-Day.

The week I turned 40 weeks, a heat wave had hit LA. We are this point still didn't have an AC unit (just lots of fans and a good). On Friday, September 11, my due date, I went to see my OB, Dr. Sharon Pushkin. The last time, with Kensi, I had scheduled my 40 week check up on my due date, and Dr. Trejo told me to go straight to the hospital. I was expecting to hear this from Dr. Pushkin, especially as I couldn't wait to be in the hospital with AC!!! This was day 3 of 90+ heat and I was dyinggggg! Unfortunately her news wasn't what I wanted to hear. My contractions were not consistent and I was only 4 centimeters. You have to be 5 for them to send you to the hospital.  This pregnancy, unlike the first two, I tested positive for Group B Strep, so I knew i had to go to the hospital to get 4 hours of antibiotics before I delivered the baby. Still, even with this, Dr. Pushking told me to go home, relax, contract and then if they got stronger and better, to give her a call

So (sadly) that's exactly what I did. Went back home, got into my bedroom, placed every fan in there and pointed them all to me, and I lay there, in our bed, relaxing through contractions, both big and small, Thankfully after only a few hours my contractions become stronger and closer together, when I called Dr. Pushkin she gave me the go ahead to go into the hospital. Friends from church came to be with Novi and Kensi, and then Nathan and I drove a few mins to get to St. John's/Providence Hospital in Santa Monica, CA.

When we arrived at the hospital it was a little after 4pm. We had a bunch of stuff to take in (most know I'm not the best at packing light) and as we were getting everything out of the car a little boy, around the ages of 12/13 drove past us - not on the sidewalk, but through the hospital parking lot. As he was passing us he yellled, "Good luck would the baby!" Nathan and I thought it was such a rare occurance - for a little boy to ride his bike through the hospital then personally congratulate and encourage us. We joke around how that boy much be Nessa's guardian angel. Seems like he just could be :).

Once we finally got admitted to the hospital I had to go through my 4 hour rounds of antibiotics. That was no fun. Having to sit still and just wait until that was done. Our room was just down the hall from where we had Kensi, Our nurses were terrific and kind and caring. Dr. Pushkin was excited about this being baby day - and yet again, on their due date! This would make 3 for 3 being born on their due date!

I had never labored through the night before, but this time, once the antibiotics were done being administed, it was around 9pm. So I tried and Nathan tried to sleep as much as we could. I did a lot of my Bradley Method techniques and Nathan would coach me and encourage me to keep going when the contractions started to get longer and closer together. I remember it being around 2am, and since I couldn't sleep, I figured I could labor and maybe watch some TV - keep me distracted. That wasn't a great idea. The contractions were getting worse and I thought to myself, I need to have the nurse check me because it may be nearing time to push. To my surprise I had only gone up to 6cm and I couldn't believe that I was only that far along! It was frustrating. I was tired but totally unable to asleep. Nathan kept coaching me and rubbing my back and we got through the next few hours.

Around 4am, Dr. Pushikin asked if I wanted to break my water. Typically I don't like to do this, but I was tired and thought about how this could really help me progress and get to the pushing stage. So she broke my water and it seemed as if my contractions stopped! They slowed down so drastically, and I could tell Doctor was a little concerned. Thankfully after some other relaxation techniques the contractions started to pick up again. I went to 10 cm pretty quickly . At this point I'm usually freaking out and needing to push immediately. Nessa had floated upwards in my pelvis and was no longer "right there" to push out. So the pressure on my cervix was not as great, and I felt like I was able to breath and talk between contractions.

When it was time to push Nessa, I had no idea how hard it was going to be! Thankfully it only took 3 good pushes, and at 5:48am on Saturday, September 12, 2015. She weighed 7lbs 14oz even and was 20 1/4 inches long. She came out and immediately I noticed her pink skin and blonde hair. "She's Blonde!" I exclaimed. I almost couldn't believe it. The doctor put her on my chest and we started nursing immedately while the cord was pulsating before Nathan cut it. I couldn't believe it - a blonde little girl. Her skin was cute and pink and her lips were so cute and squishy. Our  squishy little peace. She was perfect. She was our Nessa Laine. (Nessa is the short form of Agnes, which means "chaste" or  pure. Laine is another spelling for "lane" or "path." Therefore we say her name means "pure path.")

This time around I had very little tearing with no stitches needed. The placenta was in great shape. Dr. Pushkin was amazing. And I felt like superwoman. I was SO GLAD that the birth and delivery were over. and I was exhausted having been up for 24 hours. Joe Kaczorowski brought us some Chick-fil-A breakfast. I scarfed that down and decided to sleep as much as I could while Nessa slept. It was a whole new experience giving birth in the morning. Nathan and I were able to get a few hours of sleep during the day. But we were just so in awe of the little sweetie that we were holding. God's promises. A child after the storm - our rainbow baby.

Novi and Kensi adored her. Them meeting her and holding her for the first time are such sweet memories for me. Nathan and his 3 girls. It was perfect. Nessa's eyes have also stayed light, so she my light-eyed baby, too. I love how God answers prayers, even in little things like that. We are so blessed to have her in our lives. She is a beautiful soul and her spirit is sweet. Not too mention she is a hoot! What a gift we were given in sweet Nessa Laine.